Well, I’m back from a week spent in Corner Brook, Newfoundland for my cousin’s wedding—picture perfect wedding of course...congrats to John and Susan. Now, I’m readjusting to this stifling heat in Central Canada.

However, more importantly, an apology and an explanation. The entry on my friend Andrew’s housing decision was an attempt at a recreation of an entry I had written earlier and had been lost. It’s not so much that I disagree with what I had said but that I had left holes that allowed insinuations to creep in. I never meant to suggest anything more about Andrew than he’s looking for a more mature living situation, a kind that I am not ready for/ don’t want at the moment. I meant only to point out the dualism of our current ideals due to our differences in situation, which Andrew also describes in his reply post. We are looking for different things that meet the different needs of where we are in our lives.
Furthermore, in terms of creative artistic temperament and talent, clearly Andrew has me, and most of the world, beaten hands down and I would never want to suggest otherwise. I also did not want to suggest there is anything wrong with Andrew’s priorities: I know that he is a caring individual with wonderful relationships with his girlfriend, family, and friends and is not overly concerned with material possessions.

All I meant is that Andrew wanted to find a perfect house, irrespective of location, and that choice had consequences. As he says, “When I suggested that I didn't care which neighbourhood we looked in, we were looking for a house, I meant just that. The house can be anywhere, literally anywhere, so long as we get a house that's big enough for us for the rent we can afford to pay.” My point was that Andrew’s choices meant some trade-offs. Of course, if he could get the perfect house in a cool neighbourhood, Andrew would do that because that’s the kind of person he is. But, by putting house first, he is pretty much ensuring that he will find a fantastic house in a lame neighbourhood. Location=expense. Nobody could afford a three-bedroom place with a backyard in one of my ideal neighbourhoods. Those houses just don’t really exist. For most people, choosing location means downscaling in terms of space and quality. That’s the trade-off: location vs. space and quality. At any price range, a person can get bigger/nicer house in the suburbs. For me, that decision is easy, but most normal, sane people would give up location as Andrew has done.
It also means that Andrew will be living with other normal, sane people who have made the same decision. Many of those people will have barbeques and nice lawns. This is not a problem: this is a lifestyle choice and a sensible one at that.
Don’t forget Andrew that you have made this choice. Your decision does indeed depend “in part about status or an expression of personality” because you have placed a value on what you find more important to you: location or quality. You, Stacey, your two cats and your kick-ass entertainment system could fit quite cosily into a nice 1 bedroom in the Market, if you so chose. It would be much smaller, no question, and you would have to give up many things for very little in terms of benefits, but it could be done. Andy and his girlfriend have done it to live in Greenwich Village. Matt and Fiona have done it, albeit more temporarily, to live in the Annex. Your house will be nicer than theirs though, no question.
It is not so nearly black and white an issue of course. Ottawa, really, isn’t that big a city. Anywhere you live, you’re pretty close to the action, such that it is. You’ve probably also not analyzed the choices in my terms and your decision was not as dramatic a one as it would be for me. But you can’t deny that neighbourhood does matter a bit. Would you have been happier in your house in Vanier if you weren’t actually surrounded by drug addicts? And honestly, if you had more money would you then downscale to live downtown, when you could live in an absolutely kick-ass place further out?
Finally though, you’re happy with your life. I know it. I can see it. I can tease you about becoming domesticated, because you are becoming domesticated and settled-at least a little bit. (Don’t worry the plaid years are still a ways away.) You like it and that’s great. I’m not ready for that kind of life yet, and that’s fine too, I think, but that’s no reason for you not to make the choices that you want. I’ll even bring the barbeque to your house-warming party.